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Sympathy Is The Last Thing I Need

Please just stop.

Stop trying to sympathize with me.

Contrary to what you think, you’re coming off as an asshole. Your comments aren’t asked for. Your attitude certainly isn’t requested.

Do you suffer from chronic migraine?

Or any condition that causes chronic pain?

Are you constantly left feeling fatigued even if you’ve just woken up from a full night’s rest?

Do you look healthy, even if you really, really aren’t?

If you answered no, politely sit down and shut up.

Now simply listen.

Don’t talk.

If I express that I’m in pain, just leave it at that. Sometimes I just need to say it out loud. Sometimes I just need the person who is closest to me to know that I can’t see anything. I need someone to be aware that I’m not doing great.

What I don’t need is a response.

I don’t need to hear how your husband or brother or best friend or ex gets this way sometimes.

I don’t need to have you explain to me that yeah the pollen levels are really taking a toll on everyone.

I could live in a fucking bubble and still have my chronic condition.

I can’t spend my whole life educating people. I can’t ask of anyone to do anything.

But it would be so nice for once if people could just skip past all the bullshit and be straightforward. I know you don’t understand what I’m going through. I know at face value, to you, it’s just a headache. But pretending to understand and then turning around and doing something that’ll worsen my condition needs to stop.

Apologies, I’m moody today.

At the end of the day. All of this, this whole mess that I never asked for, continues to just pile up and its hard. Its heavy. And its really dark.

So forgive me when I roll my eyes when you’re “tired” because you were out half the night. I’m standing next to you and I slept for 10 hours and woke up more tired than I was when I went to bed.

Forgive me when I don’t feel bad for you because your head hurts. You can pop an Advil and be fine within the hour.

Forgive me for not wanting to have a conversation with anyone when I get off work. Standing for 8 hours straight and being extremely pleasant is extremely difficult, especially if I’ve been in pain the whole time.

I live alone so that I can come home to a quiet house. So no, I won’t text you back. Or answer your message on Facebook or Twitter that isn’t urgent.

My body is failing me and I’m exhausted.

I try to put cheese back in the fridge and in an attempt to open the fridge door, I dump the cheese all over the floor.

I go to pour my coffee and realize I never pressed brew.

I physically drag myself into bed.

I try to type out a coherent thought, and it takes 10x as long to even spell half the words correctly.

So forgive me for not wanting your sympathy.

“sympathy: feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else’s misfortune”

The only misfortune is my inability to shove my boot up your ass for pretending to feel bad when I never asked you to in the first place.

Also, I’ve found a secluded cabin if anyone wants to donate to help me move in 🙂

 
A. 

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