A Little Bit About Me…
For starters, I’m Alex – short for Alexandra, named after the Russian czarina.
To point out the obvious, I have a very disabling case of chronic migraine along with a host of other conditions including widespread chronic pain, scoliosis, and a rather annoying and undiagnosed abdominal pain. As much as I’d like to separate these parts of me from me, they are the most prevalent aspects of my life – it would be rather hard to ignore the constant pain and time dedicated towards my health.
I live in a cute studio apartment, overlooking a small pond, just outside of Charleston. On most of my good days I take whatever book I’m reading (currently Every Breath by Nicholas Sparks) and head down to the beach to enjoy the soft sound of the waves crashing against the shore and catch the warm sun setting behind the pier.
I move a lot. Whether it’s within the same town, or across the country, I’ve moved 11 times calling 6 different towns and cities home in the process.
I’ve wanted to be a weather girl, a detective, a journalist, a psychologist, an architect, an interior designer, an astronaut, and a volcanologist.
I’ve been a waitress, a store manager, a tutor, an executive assistant of sorts, a design assistant, and a professional interior designer.
It’s safe to say that now, I am a writer. A painter. A horror enthusiast. A lunar photographer. A sometimes struggling plant mom. And a chef.
About My Blog:
A picture is worth a thousand words.
That’s how all of this began. It clicked, that in this journey I was destined to be on, I was alone. Alone in the understanding that everyone around me saw this “migraine thing” as black and white. How could it really be more than a headache. I mean just take an Advil, you’ll be fine, right?
There’s so much grey. So many layers in-between the positive and negative. So, I decided to stop voicing what I was going through in a half thought out Facebook posts that only received negative feedback from people who didn’t belong in my life in the first place.
With the advice of my best friend, the black and white photo montage of my blog was born. Every day, what if you only saw it in black and white? What would be missing from the story you were trying to tell?
Turns out, a lot was missing.
My blog has been a lot of things since it’s inception in the late winter months of 2018 – perhaps the best works were born in the earliest of entries. My writing has always been a therapeutic outlet, one I needed the most in what I consider “Chapter One” of my blog. This period was full of everything I wanted people to know about migraine and my experience. The ups and downs, the interaction between the sick and the surrounding society, and the self-realizations that came from various symptoms and events.
My blog began to transform as I went through the process of applying for, and being approved for SSDI. I wanted to alter my space, allow it to be a place others could come when they needed the resources I hadn’t had. I explored different topics, I toyed with featuring other writers and stories to help spread awareness, and I found that forcing myself to write more maybe made me feel like I was doing something but the therapeutic aspect was lost. This second phase of my blog captured my life and my migraine journey, but I lost myself during this time.
In the Summer of 2019, I forced myself to re-evaluate myself, my journey, and what I wanted my life to look like. It became the start of the third phase of my blog – a phase where I personally am focusing on healing, but one where my blog itself has been rather quiet.
Healing doesn’t come easy, it takes a really long time – maybe even our entire lifetime – and a lot of it is accepting that these conditions I write about, and those that I don’t, are inseparable from me and my life.
As we venture into this new decade, I want to thank you for being here. I can’t promise this is a space that will be regularly occupied, because I’m still fighting to find that place where writing is once again therapeutic. I’m fighting for a lot of things. I’m fighting for myself.
The best way to view this blog – if you’re really invested in my story this far – is to navigate to the “Featured Stories” tab where I’ve outlined the highlight reel of pieces published for easy reading.
“‘O me! O life!… of the questions of these recurring; of the endless trains of the faithless… of cities filled with the foolish; what good amid these, O me, O life?‘ Answer. That you are here – that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. That the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse.” ~ Dead Poets Society/Walt Whitman
This is my verse.
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